Adventures in Starbucks

The title of this post is a tad misleading. Yes, there is a Starbucks story here, but there is much more I want to say.

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I went to therapy today. This is a once a week thing and the whole reason I started this particular blog. Alone, this occurrence is not blog worthy; but this truly is. Therapists, case workers, hear this well: There are time that you make a great impression on your clients and you may never know how great an impression you truly had. I say this because both my therapist and case worker (as well as the intern) were full of win today.

I talk too much. I know this, and the patience these women showed me today proved they are truly professionals. This is not how they win, however. That belongs to the way they reacted to me today. With my therapist, I spoke utter nonsense, but spoke extensively about my blog (Nightmares and Chocolate) and the Bully series I am doing there. We discussed the topics I’m focusing on, my purpose for doing it, and the way it is a form of therapy for me. But then came the first win of the day: she asked for my blog address and said she’d read it.

After I went on and on over this blog, and nearly blushed to death over her saying she’d read it, I had a 30 minute break between appointments. Dad scores major win points for tossing this unexpected event my way. If you know me well (few do), or know my father at all (even fewer), then you know that Dad likes his coffee simple, and I adore Starbucks. There just happens to be a Starbucks close to my therapists office, so we took a brief trip there.

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Dad looked at all the little treats in their glass case, and stared at the menu, bewildered. When we get up to order, I expertly order my Grande Cafe Vanilla Latte with an Extra Double Shot. Dad orders a “small black coffee”. Unfortunately, it didn’t quite register to the cashier who then asked if he wanted cream or sugar. “Just black. Normal, plain black coffee.” He naturally got his drink first.

While waiting for my coffee, he watches some businessman over by the counter where they have all the extras at. The creams, sugars, and assorted other things. The way Dad was staring just had me laughing inside. He looked so terribly lost and amazed at all the little things sitting in that small space. He look so bewildered, then turned to look at me and bristled a bit. “What?” I tried, and failed, to hold the smile inside. I gave some short answer, blowing it off that it was cute how he felt so uncomfortable there. But it was truly more than that. While Dad and I discussed the various itmes on that small space, I had to smile brighter. Dad was so not comfortable there, but he knew I loved my latte. He was there not to have a cup of coffee, but because he knew I used to adore my Starbucks all the time. He made himself uncomfortable just to spoil me.

Big, giant win for you, Dad. Love you.

I was smiling brightly when we returned and I went back with my case manager. She’s an awesome lady, truly. Her assignment to me last week was to decorate my notebook. I admitted how I dreaded it at first, but now I can barely keep from touching it and treasure the thing. Its a spiral notebook, but the thing is MINE. She and the intern both cooed over it, making me feel all the happier. (Ego boosters on!) My case manager even took pictures of it, and informed me I would have had the best journal in her classes if she was still doing journaling classes. (Ego boosters blast off!) We spoke of a few things, and my blog came up again.

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Can you tell how needy I am for positive feedback yet? Well I got it again from my case manager, and the intern even asked for the address. Wins to both of them!

Well, I have 3 assignments to complete between now and the 1st. I’ll have the first assignment up soon, and then I’ll work on these next three. But today has left me smiling, and in a genuine good mood.

I beg of you all, if there are things that you need help dealing with, don’t be scared to seek help. These people are paid to be non-judgmental. They are paid to listen, and to help you cope. I hate talking about the past, there are so many hurts back there. But if I hadn’t looked for help, I wouldn’t be smiling as brightly today.

Love and Light to all!

Kat